Poll Position.

I have always liked voting. There’s something slightly otherworldly about a polling station. It’s a quiet place with an air of uncertainty about it. You creep in and it’s like revisiting your Primary school on Parents’ evening. I take my polling card to the booth and I look at the choices laid out in front of me:

This one is for decency and common sense… This one is for the rich. This next one, well, nobody is sure what he wants other than a Batman suit that fits him and free teacakes for the over 50s. My pencil hovers above the boxes in confusion and delight! Who do I pick and how absolutely marvellous it is to be grown up enough to do this. And then, the inner child pipes up and says, “Psst….I know that you are in favour of the decency guy but…..what about voting for Batman, there? C’mon, Man!” My pencil quivers… I so badly want to vote for someone rubbish who won’t do anything right at all and would probably turn out to be evil incarnate. “Don’t….do it.”, I tell myself and my pencil starts to move towards the ballot paper.

Batman or good guy? I’m sweating now and wishing that I just had the moral fibre to do the right thing. I could spoil the paper but what good would that do? My forefathers would gang up on me in a ghostly mass and kick ten shades of ectoplasm out of my spirit. I’m not risking that. This is starting to become a nightmare. 

Finally, I put a cross in the space which satisfies both the adult me and the somewhat tatty looking ghosts of my ancestors and proceed to put it in the box. Then, the other feeling comes over me… The same feeling that I get when I’m having an eye test for new glasses. I don’t know whether I have given the right answer to the big question. Can I read the fourth row down without squinting? Did I vote for the right person? Is that an ‘X’ or a ‘W’? Who puts a ‘W’ on a voting slip anyway? Into the box goes my slip and I’m done. Time to go home and impatiently await the results of the poll.

Yes, I have always enjoyed voting, even though it can be massively stressful. I hope that the right decision will be made. We’ve got to live with it for a very long time if it isn’t.




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